So I get home from an amazing long weekend at about 6:45 a.m. this morning. I rush to the shower to get ready for work and after showering I naturally linger at my closet for too much time to figure out what to wear. Then I look down and see a muddy footprint on a pair of dress pants I planned to take to Goodwill as they are too big. Well I wasn't wearing shoes so naturally I am perplexed. I pick up the pants to inspect and as I am doing this I notice that my blinds are a bit disturbed...not the way I had left them on Thursday morning. I then begin to panic a bit and open my blinds to see that my window is unlocked, again not how I left it on Thursday. I am OCD about my windows, blinds and locks. I then remember the $140 in $20 bills that I kept in a coffee can on the top shelf of my closet. I shake the can to hear a resounding silence. I take off the lid to discover the money I had been intending to take to the bank took itself to someone else's bank. I then frantically run around my apartment to see what else is missing. My laptop is on my desk/dining room table, my flat screen is stationed where is has been for the last 8 months and all of my electronics are right where I left them. At this point I'm wondering if I'm crazy so I go back to look at the pants and the empty coffee can. Muddy. Empty. My mind is racing at this point trying to figure out if money grows muddy feet and walks itself. Nope, the screen in my window has definitely been cut. The plastic makeshift bank then goes flying across the room as I throw a little fit and figure out what to do next. So I finish getting ready for work while trying very hard not to cry, forego putting on makeup knowing that the tears are coming and decide that I will lock up my apartment and call the police on my way to work. (This made sense in my head considering I was worrying about being late for work rather than worrying about someone being in my apartment.) I get on the road and scream obscenities at my phone because its not understanding the gibbering I'm stabbing into the screen as I'm driving down the road. Then the tears begin. I'm a mess wondering who was in my apartment, what they were doing, why they didn't take the thousands of dollars worth of appliances and are they coming back? I take a few deep breaths and connect to the police department and stifle my crying long enough to give the officer my address. He then tells me to go back to my apartment as I have to be there to file a report with the cop who will be on his way shortly. Duh Shannon. So I call work and leave a tearful message about coming into work as soon as I can and then call my boss and do the same. She, of course, was understanding and told me to take as much time as I needed. I then call my Mom, which of course makes me cry harder and I explain what has happened up to that point. I get back to my apartment and wait for the cop. I'm sure I look just pathetic answering the door with bleary eyes and a red face. He empathizes (gasp!) and gets the information, dusts for prints and gives me a piece of paper with some numbers on it. He tells me I'm lucky that I didn't get cleaned out (which that I am thankful for) and leaves. Somewhere in there I also called my boyfriend and cried on the phone with him for a few minutes because I know he can center me more than what I was able to do for myself at that point. I also noticed that my change jar off of my kitchen counter is missing. Asshole, I needed to do laundry after my stint out of town. After getting a few more things in order at the apartment complex office I drive to work and think and think and think. Who did I tell I was going out of town? Have I noticed any ominous figures around the building? Is there anyone that knew the money was there? None of those questions got me anywhere. That doesn't stop me from creating a short list of suspects and motives. All of them ridiculous.
So I went to work, was totally distractible and unproductive and agonized for 6 hours just waiting to get out of work so I can go back home to see if I had missed anything. I didn't, nothing else is missing. Yes I even checked my undies, people are weird and ya never know. There are a few crappy things about the entire situation. I'm poor, I'm making less than $5 an hour at the volunteer job that I am at right now. Unfortunately that was the only job I was offered and any money will help. So, that money was going to go towards oh things like rent, groceries, gasoline....things I need for living. Furthermore I am severely creeped out that someone was in my apartment doing God knows what aside from stealing my money. And lastly, it makes me questions my faith in humanity but I still find myself being thankful that they only took money and left my belongings. He was a thoughtful thief at least. I can't imagine to going to such an extreme for money, that's scary. I'm mostly just bummed at this point. Disheartened. The wind has been taken from my sails a little. But it always could be worse, right?
So my fantastic weekend ended on a bad note. Oh well, I'll survive.
I went to South Carolina for a conference about race and ethnicity. At times I was uncomfortable and felt guilty. And then angry for feeling guilty and then back to just kind of angry with people that base their actions toward other people off of the way that they look. I'm just a bit more aware now. The first night I went to a dive bar and made friends with strangers. The next night I ate delicious Cuban food and experienced the beautiful Wet Willie's I went through another day of the training and left. I swung by Atlanta to see some friends for a short time and then returned home only to get up the next day, pack, return the rental and resume my travels. The boyfriend and I spent some time together before hanging with his friends and going to another dive bar with an amazing band. The next morning we woke up and drove to Michigan. It's very convenient that our families live in the same state so upon arrival we went our separate ways and spent time with our families. Maybe another time we will spend time with each other's families but not this time. I only told my best friend I was coming up since it was for such a short amount of time and I knew I wouldn't have time to see friends in Lansing or KZoo. I'll be back up in August before school starts so I didn't feel so bad about it. I was able to meet my cousin's little boy for the first time. I'm still uncomfortable with babies that can't support their own heads. Oops.
The weekend was short but perfect, I was able to see all the family I wanted and of course play hide and seek with my nephew. The drive back was fantastic as well because spending 6 hours in a car with an attractive boy just can't be bad. We had good conversations and even better times with the pit stops.
I'm sure the unsettled feeling I have about the break in will go away eventually and in the meantime I will continue to look at the things that I have in my life rather than the things that I don't. Even if it amounts to roughly $170 and my sense of safety.
You can find me staking out my own apartment no doubt.
Have a better week than the way mine started :)
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